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Sunday, 14 August 2011

Maybe I'm One of a Kind?

or at least in the 1%??

Thanks to a friend, I started to think that I may actually be pregnant. When I took that second HPT on CD 35 and got a clear negative, I decided that it was obviously over. I started waiting for the next cycle, and waiting to start the next phase of our fertility journey. When I started having slight cramping, I figured that it was only a matter of a day or two until AF showed up like the bitch that she is.

Then a friend made a little comment... something along the lines of 'you know, there are women who get negative HPTs even when they are pregnant'... to google I go!

Sure enough. There are numerous stories out there of people saying that they had positive blood tests, positive ultrasounds, but not a positive HPT until well into their 5th or 6th month. One woman's story said that both she and her mother had had negative HPTs and negative blood tests until well into their 5th months of pregnancy... but the ultrasounds revealed babies and they delivered healthy babies.

That's great! Just great! Just when I started to feel ok with the idea of this being a failed cycle, the hope is starting to rear it's ugly head.

I looked at some websites that talk about the chances of having a negative HPT and with a pregnancy after 23 dpo. Today is CD 41 and I'm pretty sure that if I ovulated, it was on about CD 11. For those of you really bad at math, that puts me 30 DPO. So if I am truly pregnant, that would mean that I fall within the 1% of women out there who do not show positive HPT tests with pregnancy after 23 dpo.

1%

I don't know if I'm really that special. I hope I am. I really want to be... but am I? Doubtful.

If I am indeed pregnant then it's a breeze thus far. Headaches that come and go, more of a nagging pain than anything.

In the last week I've had a bit of breast tenderness and some cramping - which is why I thought that AF was on her way. This cramping feels just like it usually feels pre-AF, so I figured that it was coming in a day or two... but then it went away and nothing. Nada. Nil. I'm really tired, but that's not overly new. I've been anemic on and off so long that tired is just me.

So I really don't know what to think. I want to think that I am in a very small number of women who are pregnant with a negative HPT, but I know that's unlikely. The greater likelihood is that I'm not pregnant, that my cycle is more screwed up than I thought, and that I'm going to need Provera to start it, then the Clomid to have it run properly.

How quickly can you plunge into pre-menopause anyway? My last tests in December or January showed my reserves to be perfectly fine, so I'm thinking that's not it, but I still have the fear.

Sigh.

4 comments:

bunintheovenplease!

I suppose it's a question. Is it more upsetting to think positive and be dissapointed later - or to think negatively - for days - and then find you were wrong?

M

Even though the odds of you being pregnant are low, given the negative HPTs you took, I'd still ask for a blood test before starting Provera, just to be certain. You never know! You could wind up on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant." ;)

peg

I think that until I see a positive test, or a positive ultrasound, I will have a hard time thinking that I am pregnant. I still hope, but it will probably take a bit to convince me.

Oh, I would definitely ask for a blood test before the Provera - I wouldn't want to make that mistake. I could just wait it out, but given my history with hyperplasia, I don't want that building up again either.

Yes, I could see it now... woman who has baby fever doesn't know she's pregnant... in other news, pigs can fly! lol

Melanie

Has she checked you for PCOS and given you Metformin? Your story sounds a lot like mine.

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