Friday, 8 March 2013

Bullets, bullets, bullets

Where to start... where to start...

It's been about three months since I've last updated.  I just haven't felt up to it.  Besides the poor-me moments of thinking that nobody is reading anyway, I just think that often I'm complaining and really shouldn't.  I also start to think that I have nothing of interest to say.  But here I am, with a very long update.  I started to think that maybe part of my problem is that I'm not getting my feelings and thoughts out anymore - my poor husband can only handle so much complaining after all.  Even if nobody is reading, it is still an outlet, right?

So here goes and I apologize for the bullets but otherwise it could get even longer...

Family Drama

  • The update on my last post (my SIL's pregnancy announcement):  unfortunately my SIL miscarried in January.  We had a nice Christmas of everyone super focused on the idea of a new baby in the family (lots of fun with that one).  Then I heard second-hand from my mother that my SIL had miscarried again.  This is her 6th miscarriage.  In fact, after the one last year they were told to get genetic counselling before getting pregnant again - they decided to just let it all play out and not be careful.  So another pregnancy, and another miscarriage.  I feel horrible for them, but I don't understand why they keep doing this to themselves.
  • We had found out in September that my husband's SIL was also pregnant.  We were given basically no information on this pregnancy - not even a due date.  We were told through a text from my MIL.  In December, my husband texted his mother and asked when SIL was due - he was told "any day".  We were told three days later by text again (from his mother) that the baby had been born.  My inlaws are bizarre that way.  Very cold and not getting that this type of communication is not helpful to us.  So baby was born in December, we didn't actually meet her until February because every time we were going to be at the inlaws', the BIL and SIL decided they couldn't make it.  Rumour has it that they had to use the same fertility clinic that we are using in order to have their baby - but apparently they decided that they didn't have to have any consideration for us in how we were told, etc.
  • On another front in the new baby drama in my husband's family - apparently there has been a baptism date set for next weekend.  We haven't been officially told about it yet.  MIL mentioned it in passing, as in "well if you're coming in next weekend we will be gone to K's baptism on Sunday".  WTF, hubby only has one sibling and this is his only niece, but apparently we aren't important enough to warrant an invitation to the baptism!?  Hubby is pretty even tempered, but he's pissed.  He said that if we don't get invited, that that's it - he's done with his brother!  I don't blame him.
  • We got to spend a week trapped in a hotel room with the inlaws - all of them, including the new baby.  We all went to Hawaii for a week.  I'm not complaining about getting a trip to Hawaii, but the company became rather frustrating at times.  It has been made abundantly clear that hubby and I are nothing now because we don't have a baby... nice reminder of the infertility while on vacation.
  • I think that I had mentioned that I had a biopsy at the end of November.  It was the most painful thing that I have ever endured.  She had to go in 7 times to try to get some tissue.  There was a lot of blood in the uterus so she didn't think that she had gotten any tissue.  When I went back to see her in January, it turned out that there was a little bit of tissue in the sample.  The tissue was clear of any hyperplasia, precancer, or cancer... so yay!  But the oncologist wanted a better sample to ensure that it wasn't just that little bit of tissue that was clear.  She scheduled a D&C for the end of the January.  She decided on a D&C under general anesthesia because I just can't handle the pain of biopsy anymore.
  • At the end of January I had a D&C.  It went fairly well.  She was impressed with what she saw and said she thought that it looked good.  I went back in February and she said that there was no sign of hyperplasia, precancer or cancer in any of the tissue - which means that I've been clear for six months at least since August's biopsy was clear.  Then she told me that she wouldn't release me to the RE until she had one more clear test.  So the next biopsy is to be done in late April which means that we should have results by mid-May and hopefully be to the RE by late May.  
  • When I was in for the D&C it was discovered that I had some really high blood pressure - we're talking somewhere around 170/110.  The first read came in at 215/120 and the nurse when running for backup thinking that I was about to stroke out.  The anesthesiologist gave me something to bring it down during and after surgery, and made me promise to see my GP.  I saw my GP a few weeks ago and she gave me some drugs to bring it down.  This week I had a follow-up with the GP and the BP was down to 140/85.  The GP is very happy with the bottom number and feels that the top will still come down more with some time.  I have a follow up in April with her and we'll see how it is then.
  • During the BP appointment I started coughing - I got back from Hawaii and promptly got sick - and the GP dropped everything, grabbed her stethoscope and checked my chest.  It took her about 15 seconds to tell me that I had bad bronchitis.  She put me on antibiotics.  I know that antibiotics don't usually make a difference in terms of bronchitis, but it's more of a warding off something worse.  I have a tendency to have any lung infections become pneumonia, so the antibiotics will help prevent that.  So far, the cough has improved - the rattle is gone and I can sleep at night now so that's good.
That's about all I can think of right now for updates.  I will give you an update of my trip - the good parts - later this weekend (maybe even with some pictures).



Grrr. Family.

I'm glad the D&C came back clear. Not nice that you have to have another test though.

Mr. Thompson and Me

I'm glad you're back!

...and "boo" to the in laws. That doesn't sound very nice and you definately deserve nice!


Well, you know that I'll always read whatever you have to say. And if it helps you to get it all out, do it and don't worry about complaining. I personally prefer to call it venting. :)

I just don't understand the situation with your BIL and SIL. Why are they being so weird with you guys???? I wonder if this is their way of trying to be sensitive to your situation, but it's just coming off as cold and uncaring.

That's really sad about your other SIL. I hope they're going to look into genetic counseling now. I can't imagine continuing to go through that kind of loss.

I was wondering if your BP might be related to the medication the oncologist has you on. Has anyone mentioned if it's a possible side effect?


Yes, I wondered too if the cancer drugs could be the cause of the higher BP. My BP has always been on the high end of normal - usually around 130/85, but there has never been a concern given that there is a family history of BP issues, the docs have always said it was fine. A couple of weeks ago I actually looked up the drug that I'm on for the cancer stuff and one of the side-effects is high blood pressure. So it's likely that's the problem. I'm going to ask the GP in April if when I'm off the cancer drugs, if my BP drops can I just reduce the BP meds - I have a home monitor so at least I'll know.


Oh my gosh, you have had your plate full. Families can really suck sometimes. :-( I'm glad that everything came back good for the biopsy- will be even more glad when the April one comes back clear. Hope the BP gets under control and you are staying healthy. By the way, vent all you need- it is your space.

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