RE visit

Well the RE appointment wasn't too bad, but it's not everything that I hoped for either.  Here's the basics...

• Apparently I've shrunk or something - I think the nurse was just too short to properly measure me, because I am definitely not less than 6 feet.  I haven't been below 6 feet since highschool, I've definitely not shrunk 2 inches in the last 6 months.  

• We waited a long time, but at least there were comfy couches and the room was private - nobody else in there which is good because it's also the maternity waiting room.... that's awkward!

• We met with the resident who did a history - she led me to believe that we weren't looking at a favourable response from the RE - and then left us in the meeting room while she consulted with the RE.

• The RE came in and talked with us for a while.  She was naturally concerned about the hyperplasia and suggested again that a hysterectomy is the typical treatment.  I made it clear that we've heard that before and I'm not interested until we have a child.  She agreed and said that there are more conservative treatments and I'm on one of them, so that's the best move right now.  She said that as soon as we get a clear biopsy, we should do IVF right away.

• The discussion of IVF led to a discussion about weight.  I shouldn't be surprised - I expected it.  Nearly every time I see a new doctor, the discussion goes to weight.  First of all, let me say that I"m more than aware that I'm fat - I've been fat since I was a kid.  This is not a surprise - often I want to get a shocked look on my face and say "what???  I'm fat???? when did that happen???", but given that I want this doctor to help me, I figured I should just shut the fuck up!  

• The RE said that to do IVF, she would prefer the BMI to be below 35, but in the very least below 40.  She said 40 is only if there are no other health issues (blood pressure, blood sugar, etc) and that if she can visualise the ovaries well.  She went on to explain that when you are overweight, the ovaries don't stimulate properly (well no, actually mine grew a nice egg on just 50 mg of Clomid), the lining doesn't cooperate (well mine would probably be uncooperative without extra weight too - it just hates me), the body doesn't stand up well to pregnancy (well, I've known a lot of women who are overweight who have had perfectly healthy pregnancies).  Anyway, she said that BMI below 40 is a must and she wants it below 35.

• I've lost 33 lbs and brought my BMI down nearly 5 pts since the beginning of May, so that's good... but I just walked away feeling like it just wasn't enough.  How about credit for what I've already done... doesn't that mean anything?  She said that I should keep doing what I"m doing, and keep working on losing while I'm on the cancer treatments.  To bring my BMI to the level she wants, I need to lose another 80 lbs!!  That's a lot.

• She did a trans-vag ultrasound and Mr. Wand-erful saw my left ovary no problems.  It was perfectly healthy and had about 10 follicles on it.  She said that was great given that I"m on meds that should be suppressing the ovaries.  So they are in good shape if my hormones would cooperate.  She also said that she could easily see it to do retrieval so that was good.  She could not find the right ovary though.  She wanted to know if anyone had ever seen it.  I said that I'd never had a scan where they couldnt' find it.  She said sometimes it's a fluke and it hides a bit, so she wasn't too worried.  She said that if the left one was developing follicles, then the right probably was too and that she thought my numbers were good.

• The good news is that she measured my lining and it's down to 15 mm.  I know that sounds bad and she said "oh, it's still quite thick"... but in November it measured 28 mm and in March, the ob/gyn estimated it to be around 35 mm, so 15 is great!  Hopefully it shrinks more by August.

So the end result was that we are looking at an appointment in September after the August biopsy results.  Hopefully the biopsy is clear and we can start some major planning at that time.  She couldnt' do any blood tests because I"m on these high dose progresterones and on CD 110.  I asked about doing Clomid and IUI for a couple of cycles first and she said if we wanted to we probably could rather than jumping right into IVF.  She even said that it's possible that if we could get the lining to cooperate, stimulating ovulation might be all we need.  Plus the cost of IUI is much much cheaper.

So, that's where we're at.  I felt like shit all day yesterday because I was feeling pissed about not losing enough weight, etc.

At least we're in to her now and the fall appointment should be easy to book - so that's a good thing.