Tuesday, 26 April 2011

Extra Stress

We went to my grandmother's for Easter weekend. I love my parents, but I can only take so much of my mother.  Now, you would think that given how stressful my mother can be  at times (and this weekend was no exception), this post would be about her.

Not the case.

We were having a lazy Easter Sunday afternoon.  Supper was nearly finished and my husband was napping on the couch in basement.  Then his phone dinged with a text message.  He had been waiting to hear back from his parents, and I was watching an item on ebay so I checked his phone.  I do this regularly, it wasn't an issue of privacy.

Was I surprised!  The message read "Happy Easter".  It was from his ex-girlfriend who we'll call April.  Why April?  Because that is her name and I have no problem outing this b*&$#.  In fact, if I could remember he last name I'd post that too.  Let me give you some background.

My husband and this woman broke up about 7  years ago.  She broke it off with him as I understand - to get back together with her ex.  She was cheating on him before they broke up.  Two years later, he and I got together.  It was at that point that she suddenly appeared in his life again.  She started calling asking for favours.  She started needing rides here and help doing that.  She started calling at all times of the day and night. Basically driving me crazy!  I started trying to be the supportive, "cool" girlfriend.  "no problem, go ahead and help her out, I'm not threatened".  But when it started to appear that she had ulterior motives - as in, wanting him back- I put my foot down.  I had a meltdown and said that he had to choose.  He chose me and told her that they were done.

Since that time she's popped up a couple more times.  Each time it starts quietly enough, and then eventually she is starting to make comments about getting back together.

So this message said "Happy Easter".  When my husband woke up, I told him to check it.  He thought that it was maybe something that she just sent out to all of her contacts.  I think it was a gateway message. I know that sounds funny, but I'm not an idiot. I know lots of women (me included) who have done that to a guy who they just weren't over.  "hey"  and he responds.  Pretty soon you're having a full conversation, and eventually the topic gets around to the two of you.  I'm not stupid.  I have no doubt that that was her plan.  She's tried before, why not now.  I told my husband that we've been together for five years, married for nearly two, and with everything that we're going through on the baby road, I couldn't deal with the stress of her.  HE needed to make it abundantly clear to her that she missed her chance.

He agreed right away and sent her a text message saying that she was not to text him anymore and that they could not be friends.  He wished her a happy life and sent the message.  You know what... she didn't reply.  Do you know what that tells me??  It really was a gateway message.  If it was simple send-to-all situation, and I was her, I would have responded to him with "sorry, I sent it to everyone.  I understand.  It won't happen again".  But she didn't.  She instead didn't get the response she wanted, so she gave up. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad she gave up - but something tells me that it isn't over.

Basically, what I'm saying is, if she starts up again, I'm going to need some backup in the gang that I"m going to form in order to track her down... any takers??



*starts shining the brass knuckles*

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